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Guide

The Weed-Lover's Guide To Disneyland

Because weed gives even the most diehard Disney fans a fresh set of eyes.

The idea of getting high at Disneyland may seem like a joke to some, but it’s really a missed opportunity to spend an entire day in a magnificently detailed theme park without the soothing effects of CBD and the imagination-enhancing effects of THC. While it would be foolish to get inconsolably high in the middle of a ride line packed with children, just the right buzz will turn an already enjoyable experience into an unforgettably good one. These products will help to keep you sane in long lines, quell your stomachaches between churros, and turn the Happiest Place On Earth into something much higher. We know this because the Proper Cannabis Committee (PCC) tests thousands of products with the sole purpose of finding the right highs for precisely these situations.

Before we get to the products, I want to leave you with this friendly reminder: We intentionally packed this list with edibles—the most discreet of weedy treats—so please pace yourself. Keep in mind that there are kiddos around and it would likely affect their development to witness a grown adult pass out in the middle of Main Street because they got too high and went several hours without drinking water. Don’t be that guy. Instead, plan your route around a couple of the pairings listed below and as the Blue Fairy told Pinnochio, let your conscience be your guide.


Good for: walking down Main Street
Product: Kin Slips' Park Life
Potency: 1mg THC, 10mg CBD per strip

Kin Slips’ Park Life is a spiced citrus sublingual strip that should leave you clear and calm with a side serving of relief. Pop a strip under your tongue while you’re still in the parking lot. By the time you get off the tram and through the line, this CBD-heavy helping should leave you feeling balanced and breezy without a hint of intoxication so you can navigate the initial crowd with ease. (Just take it from PCC member Norma Kwee, who wrote a review about this very situation.) Pick these up if you have ambitions to see and do more than your body can realistically handle.

Good for: cruising through the line to Space Mountain
Product: Korova's Saturday Morning Mini Cookies
Potency: 10mg THC per cookie

Korova's Saturday Morning Mini Cookies are good for a spacey afternoon in the sun. They typically provide a calm and content high that can zone you out, so this is the perfect edible for those long-ass lines in Tomorrowland. The wait won’t bother you and the onset should kick in just as you reach the end of the line, leaving you blissfully entranced in the glow of the fake stars and rapid turns of this classic Disney ride.

Good for: floating down Storybook Land Canal
Product: Juna's Jade Drops
Potency: 2.5mg THC, 2.5mg CBD per dose

Juna's Jade Drops provide a wash of calm and an earthy flavor. The balanced ratio of THC and CBD develops into an ideal buzz for the more mellow rides in Fantasyland, so try a small dose with lunch and let the breezy buzz enhance your ride down Storybook Land Canal or, if you’re feeling more tropical, the Jungle Cruise. Expect to feel more comfortable in your skin as you float down the artificial river.

Good for: spinning through the Haunted Mansion
Product: Kiva's Moroccan Mint Petra Mints
Potency: 2.5mg THC per mint

Kiva's Moroccan Mint Petra Mints are a popular treat both for first-timers and cannabis connoisseurs. They're discreet to consume and icy cool in flavor. Once you’ve had your fill in Fantasyland, amble on over to New Orleans Square for a mint julep and pair with a Petra Mint or two. Keep some eye drops handy should your eyes get dry while the soothing and energetic high settles in. Keep these in mind if you need a midday boost or if you need to get ahead of crowd-induced social anxiety.

Good for: zipping down Splash Mountain
Product: Kikoko's Buzz Honey Shot
Potency: 9.5mg THC per stick of honey

Kikoko's Buzz Honey Shot is loaded with cannabis-infused honey, so you could drizzle one on a treat or just eat it straight. The result of these sustainable sticks is a typically uplifting and energized high that will have you geared up for the classic coasters of Frontierland. It's not usually overpowering but still balanced and smooth, so pair this with a beignet from New Orleans Square before you pop in line and wait for the burst of joy to hit.

Good for: enjoying with your afternoon Dole Whip
Product: Kiva's Sparkling Pear Camino Gummies
Potency: 2mg THC, 6mg CBD per gummy

Kiva's Sparkling Pear Camino Gummies are the full package. Beyond their fantastic flavor and texture, the high is typically mild and friendly, making them perfect for cannabis newcomers. You can expect a nice, relaxing body buzz accompanied by a very gentle wave of calm. Recharge after your Adventureland antics with one of these CBD-heavy gummies in the late afternoon.

Good for: taking in the firework finale or Fantasmic show
Product: Sunday Goods' Delight Disposable
Potency: 69.9% THC, 7.04% CBD

The Delight Disposable from Sunday Goods is an all-in-one vape pen with incredible citrus and cream flavors. It’s seriously like inhaling a lemon meringue pie. The resulting high is often quick-hitting and short-lived with an excited haze in the head, so it’s a perfect way to cap off your day while you watch the firework finale. I recommend you go to the Fantasmic show instead of watching the fireworks by the castle, but regardless of your choice, this high will enhance the lights and sounds and everything in between. Secure your turkey leg or churro before you sit down so you can munch in bliss while the performance absorbs you. 


About the Author

Morgan is Proper's lead copywriter. Her thoughts are almost as overactive as her mouth, so her product preferences lean towards something with a focusing effect. It doesn't hurt if that cannabis can replace a cup of coffee, too.

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