Pretty Is As Pretty Does
I tried these pastilles to see if they live up to all the hype.
Since moving to Los Angeles three years ago, I’ve acquired a taste for discreet cannabis candies. Edibles of the precious, delicate, Alice-in-Wonderland gumdrop variety have quickly become my favorite way to consume. They’re portable, inconspicuous, and produce a sustainable high when made with top-notch ingredients. Like most millenial women with an Instagram account, I’m also a sucker for beautiful branding and not afraid to admit it. Metallic tins, dainty prints, and clean, sans-serif fonts have been known to influence a purchase or two of mine, which is why Beboe’s heavily designed sativa pastilles check every box in that regard. I mean, impeccable crisp cream packaging with rose gold accents? Check. A nice, weighty matching rose gold tin with intricate Victorian embellishments? Check. And cute little diamond-shaped candies? Done and done.
“I didn’t notice much of an aroma aside from a whiff of berry here and a whisper of chamomile there.”
The founders of Beboe are no strangers to cultivating a high-end aesthetic. When you do a little research, it makes sense why Beboe was dubbed the “Hermes of marijuana” by the New York Times in 2017. Clement Kwan (a former fashion executive with Dolce & Gabbana) and Scott Campbell (celebrity tattoo artist) are focused on making Beboe the cannabis brand of choice for the Saks Fifth Avenue set. Their unique logo can be seen all over social media in the hands of beautiful influencers who I pretend I’m unfamiliar with but secretly double tap on the reg. Because of the effort Beboe has put into making sure each item looks adorable on my nightstand, I really wanted to love the pastilles. I really tried. But alas, in a tale as old as time, the product did not exactly live up to the hype.
Upon opening the tin, I didn’t notice much of an aroma aside from a whiff of berry here and a whisper of chamomile there. I could pick up on a slight weedy undertone, but it was almost unnoticeable. The experience of actually consuming the pastilles, however, can best be described as unpleasant. The candies took an oddly long time to dissolve in my mouth and the taste was a painful reminder of the chalky grape multi-vitamins I was forced to take as a kid. Every time I picked up the beautiful tin to try another pastille (for the third, fourth, fifth time...), I willfully forgot about the powdery aftertaste only to forage for any beverage that would rid the medicinal taste from my mouth.
Once digested, the effects of the pastilles were surprisingly swift. We’re all familiar with the edible waiting game—the sometimes never-ending period between consumption and the moment you feel your high coming on—but the candies admittedly kept this waiting period to a minimum. Within 25 minutes, I could feel a pleasant buzzing throughout my body and a euphoric sensation take over my brain. At 5mg each, I found that the pastilles produced reliable, uniform effects. After imbibing, I joyously packed up boxes, intensely cleaned my room, and cheerily conversed with my friends in a crowded bar, concluding that the edibles were versatile for my active endeavors.
“My favorite effects of these pastilles were the increased sociability and bursts of energy.”
My favorite effects of these pastilles were the increased sociability and bursts of energy. Focus came easily while taking on mundane tasks, and I was able to sustain all of my crappy chores with more of an upbeat attitude. While I was out and about with my friends, I layered my high with a few drinks and continuously felt like I had taken the equivalent to a small shot of espresso. The subtle effects paired quite nicely with whiskey gingers and I couldn’t quite tell where my high ended and my buzz began. An hour or so after choking down the pastilles, the truly light and pleasant effects were almost enough for me to completely (and perhaps willfully) forget how gross they tasted on their way down.
Every time I consumed the candies, they routinely delivered on their promise of an uptick in focus and joy with the added benefits of increased sociability. On their own, the effects are mild yet present. When paired with alcohol, the subtle high takes a backseat to the buzzy effects of your cocktail of choice. All in all, if you love a beautiful aesthetic, accessories for your Instagram stories, and millennial pink, these pastilles are for you. But at $65 a tin, I personally found the vitamin-flavored chalk blocks not worth the cost of admission.