Meet The Macaroni And Cheese Of Edibles
When you combine your favorite comfort food with energizing, upbeat effects, the possibilities are endless.
Fun fact: CBD is the non-psychoactive compound commonly found in hemp that has pain-relieving, stress-busting, and anti-inflammatory properties. And since hemp is the super sexy granddaddy of all weed—I mean all of it—it stands to reason that if you're not smoking weed with a harmonized balance of CBD and THC, you're not doing weed right. Aggressively stoney strains that have emerged over the past decade or so owe much of their potency to the gradual breeding out of CBD in favor of intensified THC. But in our emerging green economy, the demand for products that offer more than couchlock, cottonmouth, and cheerful malaise are in high demand. Grön's Milk Chocolate Peanut Butter Pretzel Bar is more than a psychotropic mini staycation; for me, it was a motivator, an energizer, and an intellectual pressure washer for my harried modern mind—all thanks to a thoughtful balance of CBD’s sweet comfort and THC’s big dick energy.
“The onset was a warm summer drizzle that developed into a sunshower.”
Grön's Milk Chocolate Peanut Butter Pretzel Bar is first and foremost a chocolate bar. It invites consumers in with a high-quality milk chocolate freckled by hints of peanut butter and the satisfying crumble of salty pretzel bits. The fleeting essence of cannabis flower made for a pleasant finish that, in a dreamy way, somehow placated my desire to rip a fat joint. Its subtle suggestion of a skunky bouquet is a nuance that connoisseurs will appreciate and newbies will delight in. One square of this chocolate left me wanting more—more crumbly pretzel, more rich milk chocolate, more salty peanut butter—but I know better than to be fooled by the deliciousness of a medicated edible. And if you're a chocolate freak like me, you know it’d be wise to have some chocolate, pretzels, and peanut butter nearby to placate the taste buds this edible will undoubtedly stimulate.
I knew the flavors of this chocolate would be stellar because Grön puts a deliberate focus on the quality of their bars. Thank goodness for that because the caliber of the chocolate alone was enough to brighten my morning. My day began bleakly with a screaming alarm clock, a needy toddler, a never ending to-do list, and writer's block so debilitating I could barely sign my name. Proverbial storm clouds had been gathering around my head for days, obscuring my ability to carpe any diem, but when this edible took effect, it was the thunder, the lighting, and the heavy rain I needed to finally get my motherfucking mind right.
The onset was a warm summer drizzle that developed into a sunshower, invigorating me as it washed negative thoughts, malaise, and depression from my agitated mind. A shiver of a body high shattered my fatigue and inertia. I wanted to write, or sit at the piano, or sketch some Disney princesses reimagined as afro-latinas, but the pulsating body high wanted a hike or a gentle run. The slight disconnect between the delightfully clarifying head high and bright fizzy body high reconciled itself in a matter of ten minutes, like the edible was downloading the specific plugins it needed for my operating system. The result was crystalline focus bolstered by a super soothing body buzz, effectively achieving my perfect high.
Grön's Milk Chocolate Peanut Butter Pretzel Bar owes this remarkably effective high to their 1:1 THC to CBD formula; one square of the bar contains 5mg each of both THC and CBD. As an everyday smoker, I found the diminutive serving size to be precisely enough to achieve a really spectacular high. Two servings would have overwhelmed me, and anything less than the suggested one square would have left me feeling frustratingly incomplete, like someone whistling a tune versus someone serving a full-throated operatic fantasy. I wrote with laser focus, I plunked away at my piano with joyful precision, and yes, I did sketch several Disney princesses reimagined as afro-latinas. I also enjoyed a long, leisurely stroll without the telltale throbbing thighs that typically let me know when to wrap up my physical endeavors.
I walked away from my testing of this product with a new and vital understanding of how my body reacts to a 1:1 balance of THC to CBD. In my simple, food-focused mind, CBD and THC are the macaroni and cheese of cannabinoids. Sure, they can be paired with other fare, often with spectacular results, and they each stand alone as well. When you pair the two, you end up with a cornerstone of comfort. Grön has created the macaroni and cheese of THC and CBD pairings and then doubled down on the effects by using superior materials to create something more than the sum of its parts. It’s like a lobster mac and cheese with gold leaf and shaved truffles, or squid ink angel hair with cave-aged gruyere and paper-thin Wagyu beef. My point is this: Grön created the cornerstone of comfort edibles with this bar and it’s a super sexy cornerstone any hemp granddaddy would be proud of.